Monday, March 31, 2008

RAIN

It's Monday morning - and it's raining. I didn't want to get out of bed this A.M.; that's how I knew it was raining. I wanted to just pull the covers right up to the top and stay there and lay there; it was raining. And I had this weird feeling in my joints.

Rain brings out the best in me and the worst in me. It makes me thankful because I know it's refreshing the earth and it's one of God's gifts to the land and to His people. Job 5:10 says God BESTOWS rain on the earth. He BESTOWS it. He graces us with it; blesses us with it; provides it for us; permits us to share in some of His best stuff - as a gift - wrapped in wet. And so, that makes me thankful, which is GOOD.

But then - I just want to stay in bed and enjoy that gift. And that's BAD. Actually, I don't KNOW if that's bad, but most of the people I know who know what I do would probably THINK it was irreponsible and bad.

So, I'm up and going. I'm not just SAYING that, because you don't really KNOW if I'm up and going or not. For all you know, I could be writing this from my bed right now with my laptop on my ... well ... on my LAP.

But no. I'm really up. Really I am. Let's both enjoy the rain today. No matter where you are. And be thankful.

Friday, March 28, 2008

BACK IN THE SADDLE

It has been 3 months since I last posted -- mostly because I was trying to decide if I truly had anything to say and if I wanted to say it that often -- or trying to decide if anyone would care. I still don't know the answer to "B."

After some time thinking and praying about it, I decided I would share my thoughts with whomever wanted to listen -- and, if nothing else, use them to express to God. I'm pretty sure HE'll be listening.

This week ended one of the longest life-desert periods for Joelene and me. The house that we had moved out of and had on the market for the past YEAR finally sold this week. A whole year of two mortgages, two electric/water/gas bills - two tax bills - and a winter with more snow than any winter since 1886. And me, paying my next door neighbor at the unoccupied house to shovel the snow that compiled in our driveway BY THE INCH. What was it? Ninety inches of snow this winter. Um-hm. Do the math.

Anyway, the almost-shocker, which our realtor mercifully withheld from us until AFTER all the papers had been signed - was - that the deal almost fell thru. After a year of trying to sell the house, for some personal reasons, the buyers nearly backed out just 24 hours prior to signing.
But they didn't. Close call.

So now - I get to reflect back --- to see how I behaved over that year of pain and uncertainty. And truthfully, I'm not sure that I was a great model of a faith-filled believer. I mean, I had my days --- but overall --- the stress, fear, anxiety and unrest really got to me. I'd like to say the opposite was true -- that I was filled with this constant sense of relief, comfort, joy and that 'everything was going to be all right,' but REALITY is that I struggled with what the future held. I see it now - from the shore -- now that I've been rescued and put back on dry ground -- I see God's Hand - His care - His love -- but while on that tossed sea, I found it tough to get a grasp on it all.

So I guess I'm human after all.