In our recent four-week "UNCENSORED" series at Journey Church, we invited folks to submit questions on marriage, sex, purity and relationships.
Below is one of those questions ...That sounds conditional; if someone breaks the covenant, then the deal is off. Yet the message seems to be that a covenant can't have conditions - it's forever - no matter how someone behaves toward us.
A. First of all, great question.
To clarify, we have said on many occasions that we do not advocate for a person remaining in a home that is unsafe. There are certain times when leaving is better.
The Bible also gives us some careful stipulations regarding folks who are victims of a partner's lifestyle of adultery, seriously dishonoring the marriage. This doesn't mean whenever any kind of mistake in this area is made, the offended partner has the 'Biblical right' to depart the marriage. The issue goes far deeper than that and we have seen many marriages healed and re-committed to - re-covenanted - where there was a one-time tragic moment or a series of moments of indefinite. Where someone has a repentant heart, the miraculous can happen.
In Deuteronomy, although God did give conditions for the Israelites being blessed, He was saying if they chose to go their own way, they'd be given over to their own destruction because of their evil hearts and actions. Even then, God never left them -- and God didn't say HE would destroy them; only that their own end would come should they break the covenant.
Then in Jeremiah 31, there is a New Covenant prophesied: 'I will make a new covenant with the house of Israel, not like the covenant I made with their fathers when I took them by the hand to bring them out of the land of Egypt, My covenant they broke, though I was their Husband. But this is the new covenant I will make with them: "I will put My law within them, and I will write it on their hearts. And I will be their God and they shall be My people. For I will forgive their iniquity and I will remember their sin no more."'
Hebrews 8, 9 - ' ... in speaking of a new covenant, He makes the first one obsolete. And what is becoming obsolete and growing old is ready to vanish away ... therefore He is the Mediator of a new covenant ... '
Then Jesus also speaks in Luke 22 as He's leading His disciples in the Last Supper: "This cup that is poured out for you is the new covenant in My blood."
You're living today in the New Covenant, made possible for you by the death burial and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Hold fast to your marriage covenant. Jesus died for it.
I'm praying for you.
And be blessed.
2 comments:
Jesus died for my marriage, or Jesus died for me? Are you willing to sacrifice the people that Jesus died for on the altar of marriage?
(And I'm not referring to something as superficial as sacrificing someone's happiness in marriage - I'm referring to sacrificing someone's identity as a child a God in order to honor the [supposedly unconditional] covenant of marriage.) Is that what Jesus died for?
Or did He die for ME -- so that He could be my God and I could be His (and not so that my marriage or my husband could be my god, which is what my husband demands [in not so many words]).
Hello there. Thanks for responding and asking your question.
It sounds like it isn't easy. I'm so sorry to read that.
I agree with you. Jesus died for individuals, not for organizations or for institutions or for ceremonies or anything else - just you - and just me.
I've never said differently than that. I've never said that Jesus died for marriage. He died for YOU. Once you received Him, you then agreed to live within His Word and His covenant with you and everyone else that you meet, including a spouse.
Again, I realize this can be very challenging at times because of circumstances, personalities, and other painful dilemmas.
Your worth comes from your Father in Heaven, not from what any man (or woman) says about you. You are forgiven, blameless, holy in Christ, chosen, blessed and a thousand other things. You are also called to your marriage, to be an example of what Christ did for you by giving His life.
I'm so sorry that your husband might be selfish or demanding or domineering. My best thought for you is not to make up my own wisdom but to share what the Word says about this. I Peter 3 describes a woman who might be living with a man who doesn't believe or who has no fruit as a Christian, though he may claim Christ. It says to 'live in a way that is pure and holy, putting forward respect for your husband, have a spirit that is quiet and gentle' --- and of course, pray for him.
I'm praying for you as well, friend. I know it isn't easy.
Many blessings.
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