Monday, November 3, 2008

GRILLED CHEESE


This isn’t that easy to write tonight. I’m embarrassed you will think less of me after reading it. I might lose some face here. But the TRUTH is – I don’t know how to do ANYTHING in the kitchen. It’s true. I couldn’t boil water if my life depended on it. I’ve just never paid attention to kitchen activities, nor have I taken one bit of interest in any of the processes – not to mention, I have a wife who is an amazing cook and very INTO all the kitchen junk – and three daughters, blah-blah-blah – so hopefully you can see why and how I have just never put my hand or head or heart toward anything in that part of home life.

Criticize me if you want to, but I’m just telling you it hasn’t been necessary to think about all these years.

Until yesterday.

I came home from church and no one was home. So I tinkered around for awhile WAITING for someone to come home. And when she did (Joelene), the conversation went something like this, with slight editorial license by me, but not much:

HER: “Have you had anything to eat yet?”

ME: “No. Not YET.” (Seismic hint)

Well, were you going to GET something to eat?”
“I don’t know. WAS I?”
“You could make a grilled cheese and warm up some soup.”

“Umm … OK … I guess I could warm up soup. But … make a grilled cheese? I’ll just warm up some soup.”

“No. Make yourself a grilled cheese.”
“Umm … I don’t know how.”

“You don’t know how to make a grilled cheese sandwich?”
“Is there an ECHO in here? No. When in 27 years of marriage have you ever seen me make a grilled cheese sandwich?”

(Rolling of eyes) “OK. I’ll show you how, but you have to do all the work.”

(Sigh) “I’ll just warm up some soup.”

(Rolling of eyes) “No. It’s so easy. I’ll show you.”

(Sigh) “WellOK.”

All right then. Get the skillet out.”
“Wait. Where is the skillet?.”

(Rolling of eyes) “Over there with the OTHER pans and skillets.”

“OK.”

“Now – turn the burner on to medium. While you’re waiting for that to heat up, get out everything you’re going to need – two kinds of cheese, two slices of bread, and butter. That’s it. While you’re doing that, to save time and so it’s all ready at once, pour the soup into a bowl now and put it in the microwave for two minutes at 70% power.”

“This is kind of complicated.”

(Rolling of eyes) “You can sit at your desk and counsel a person with the phone on one shoulder while having an e-mail conversation with four other people at once while reading a book and writing music on your desk – and you can’t do THIS? I don’t think you’re trying.”

“I’m trying.”

“Yes – you’re VERY trying.”

“Can we finish this, please? I’m hungry.”

“Yes. I think your grilled cheese is done.”“What? Already?”

“Yes.”

“Oh. OK. That wasn’t that hard.”

“I tried to tell you.”

(Delivering the grilled cheese to my plate and taking the heated soup from the microwave): “Well, thanks. This is great.”

“Aren’t you forgetting something?”
“I said, ‘Thanks,’ right?”

“Yes, but I meant the dirty skillet and soup container. They go in the dishwasher.”

(Sigh)


So --- I learned something very valuable today – a new life skill. How to make a grilled cheese and soup lunch --- and how to put my dirty dishes away.

Thanks, honey. You're the BOMB!

And be blessed.

3 comments:

allisonlayne said...

i may be one of the few people who is so not at all suprised by this posting:)

Mrs. M said...

awwww...I'm so proud of you!

Anonymous said...

THAT is hysterical - haha. I think it's great that you admit your humaness ways :o) Just think, now you can cook grilled cheese sandwiches and soup for your grandchildren!