TOILET PAPERING

I can't believe I'm actually blogging about this -- but our house was T.P.'ed Saturday night. If you're unfamiliar with the concept, T.P. stands for toilet paper. The idea, as its name suggests, is the act of covering an object (usually a tree or house) with toilet paper. This is typically done by throwing numerous T.P. rolls in such a way that they unroll in mid-air and fall on the targeted object.

This activity has become a popular tradition in the United States, particularly in homes where teenagers live. It is most often done in small groups at night and the result is T.P. covering trees and shrubbery (although one time, years ago, someone climbed on our ROOF and T.P.'ed up there as well). We were NOT happy.

I have a complicated tale about one of our daughters being involved in this activity that I won't go into right now ... or ever. Toilet papering is not necessarily an act of vandalism, but in some states it is a crime. However, it is rarely enforced.

The internet even tells you HOW to best T.P. a house. If you're interested ...

1. Get LOTS of T.P.

2. Pick a good time - preferably when the neighborhood is asleep.

3. Don't freak out if you make a little noise.

4. Smoothly launch the roll of T.P. up over the high branches. It should cascade down on the other side. Go over and get the roll and repeat as necessary. Make sure to throw it up as high as possible since you don't want it to be to easily cleaned up and you want your 'work' to last for a couple of days.

5. Rip off small pieces of T.P. and scatter them all over the lawn.

6. Wear running shoes and navy blue or black.

7. Park away from the house. Some houses have cameras.

8. Be quick, but don't leave without admiring your work.

9. Related websites: "How to sneak around at Night" and "How to walk Silently."

This is outrageous information - but like everything else - you can find it online under "How to Toilet Paper a House" --- and --- well --- you can find it here too now.

We have probably been toilet papered 25 times over the years. As our children are getting older, we see it happen less and less. BUT ... we got it Saturday night. We used to be told it was an 'honor' to get T.P.'ed. It meant somebody out there LIKED you.

They never liked us well enough to come back and help us (meaning ME) clean it up, but ... it's good to know we have friends who love us. With friends like these ...

And be blessed.